2003-09-28 - 11:00 p.m.
Another delightful family gathering today.
Once I banned my cousins from poking me in the ass with sticks (which seems all vaguely fetishistic and S&M), they took to just tossing the sticks at my face.
And then when I broke down and screamed,
"NO MORE STICKS!!! I don't care if we're related, I will kill you in a very painful fashion if one more stick hits me!"
They then took to casually throwing small rocks at my face, which provided them with much more happiness than the sticks seemed to. So I ended up unscathed, luckily, and only a slight case of agita on the way home, which This American Life cleared up quickly.
I just don't get how my boy cousins got so mean. Their response to everything was:
"Oh yeah? Well at least I'm not as ugly as you." or some variation thereof.
Sample conversation:
Me: Guys. Dinner's on the table. Move it.
Small Jerk: Yeah, well you're ugly.
It's like a self esteem lowering party.
And the hugest travesty was that I got in trouble for my response of "But I'm not nearly as stupid as you." Like I'm supposed to be the mature one when he totally started it. Besides, he's eight. That's mature enough for me.
His most obnoxious remark all day was a 4 minute tirade on just how ugly and dumb and ass-like I am. I looked at him square in the eyes before replying
You are totally going to be a virgin for the rest of your life.
~j
+Spoon+
|
|
|